magicconchshell:

imagine if you went to go see a horror movie but it was just a slide show of your middle school selfies for an hour

jacknoir-sexual:

OKAY SO

I WANTED TO TAKE PICTURES OF MY DOG BUT HE JUMPED AND

FUFUKCINGH

THE MOTHERFUCKING SCHOLASTIC BOOK FAIR THOUGH MAN.

DO YOU REMEMBER THAT?

IT WAS LIKE MOTHERFUCKING CHRISTMAS.

YOU GOT TO BUY BOOKS, AND THEY HAD TOYS, AND UGH SOMETIMES THE BOOKS /CAME WITH TOYS/ AND THAT WAS JUST THE FUCKING BEST.

(Source: harleycitysiren)

fake-mermaid:

i think one of the hardest things in life is trying to get comfortable in bed when you have boobs

r u a math problem because ur making me cry 

(Source: jesussbabymomma)

illkim:

You have no idea what I’ve been through in my life. I had the ORIGINAL GameBoy Advance. That shit had no light and I had to find the perfectly lit room. You don’t know what I come from.

(Source: illkim)

lolhellno:

my-rain-day:

lolhellno:

sex is so weird its literally just putting your penis inside someone else’s penis like. what the fuck

i dont think thats how it works

yes it is. ive had so much sex. a lot. like 100 sex

(Source: lolhellno)